Gross or Not Gross…

I was going to write a response to this article and I will, but reading the comments pretty much summed up my feelings about periods, sex, and where people are allowed to stand.

What makes me angry here is the insinuation that men are condemning women as gross and unnatural just because they feel uncomfortable with menstrual blood. The comments here show a greater understanding of how a sexual relationship should work, where each party makes concessions far enough that both are pleased. I appreciate that the author points out that requests for other kinky acts should be done with an understanding that if period sex is what she wants it’s a fair question. But I also think there is room, particularly early in a relationship, where it’s totally ok to take a few days off a month until you get more comfortable with each other.

Besides, if a guy has never been exposed to menstrual blood he might not really have any idea what it’s like. The idea of “bleeding” tends to call up images of Tarantino style blood splatters which is not exactly sexy. Until someone is comfortable enough with you to enter in to this uncomfortable realm you can’t say he’s a total jerk or a misogynist. Not liking blood is not akin to not liking women.

The Bride is murderous, not menstruating.

I do believe, however, that there are some hilarious misconceptions about what menstrual blood is like.

Feministe had a round up of the article that included this little quip:

I have met a grand total of one dude in my entire life who was like “no” on the period sex (for the record, he wasn’t saying no in the moment; it was a general conversation, not a negotiation). His reasoning was “it’s gross.” And when I stopped seeing him approximately 24 hours after that conversation, my reasoning was, “I don’t want to be with someone who thinks that a natural, healthy uterus-having body is gross.”

While I have met few men in my life that have issues with it, I have never thought this harshly about it. I just think “Poor, misinformed soul. You are allowed to have your opinion, but some day maybe some special lady will change it for you.”

If men bled once a month it would take me a spell to get used to it, too. I don’t blame men for being grossed out, but I do blame them for not being open minded if they are with a desiring and equally open minded lady.


About Charlotte

In an attempt to figure it all out, I've broken the world up in to tiny pieces and am conquering them one at a time.
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